thedeadparrot (thedeadparrot) wrote,

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thedeadparrot's Guide to Writing Fic Just Like Hers

Ever wanted to know how I write? No? Well here's your chance to learn, anyway!

1. Make something really stupid up. Like John Lennon coming back to life during the second iceage, and start writing. Have a genearl idea, but no outline, because outlines are for people with time, energy and motivation.

2. Listen to music while writing, because this supposedly helps you add "mood." 90% of the time this music will be Radiohead.

3. Write out your idea in as little time as possible. Make sure that half of what is going on will confuse any reader who doesn't live inside your brain. The less coherent it is, the better. Explanations are not important. Make sure your fic isn't too long as well, if you go over 5,000 it's TOO LONG. Plus, if you do that, you're not writing a character study/thinly veiled attempt at plot.

4. Feel special.

5. Stick details/explanations in, because you are a feedback h0r, and people don't give feedback to stories that make no sense (unless they're convinced you are a genius, in which case, you wouldn't be writing like me). Make sure that your fic still reads like a shopping list, because flowing descriptions are for people who have more than one writing style.

6. Read it again, and realize just how dumb and repetetive your phrases are (when they're over three/four words long). Fix them and angst a bit.

7. Send the fic off to your beta(s). Be sure to prod them once a day to make sure they don't forget that you're their #1 priority.

8. Get your story back and realize that you made another 889328 mistakes that you didn't notice. Fix them and feel dumb.

9. Stare at it for a few days. Pick up things that neither you or your beta has picked up. Be indecisive about posting. A flip-flopper, if you will.

10. Pick a title. It's best to grab stuff from your "mood music". Song titles/lyrics are your friend. Album titles will do in a pinch.

11. Release your fic to the general public. Cry when no one recognizes your twu genius.

12. Write dumb crap in your journal explaining your planning process for world domination.
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